PSA: I haven’t written in a while… been kinda caught up with life, work, and personal development. Most of this is honestly because was dating someone pretty cool!
(I’ll leave that there because when they see this I want them to know I respect them and I’m learning to work with someone else and not work alone. Which is quite hard for me because well… I haven’t really seriously dated much! I digress )
Mirrors are a reflection of ones self. A view point that is mainly that of vanity by modern standards.
NOW, When I say mirror… I’m simply stating ones perceived perception of self.
Little know fact. What you see in the mirror isn’t always exactly how you look to other people unless you use a true mirror.
In the past few months I’ve had to look at myself for the best and the worst of me…
To be honest I’m not as happy as I thought I would be! Yes, I’m not the worst person, however, I’m not the kindest either.
I’m cold, blunt, brash, selfish, really close to being emotionally manipulative, and who knows what else. GOOD thing it wasn’t on purpose.
As a child I was loved and protected and sheltered. Yet my natural analytical side allowed me to see body language and read between the lines of everyone else but myself.
I created defense mechanisms to control and avoid pain and get what I wanted..
AGAIN NOT ON PURPOSE.
Meeting the person I was dating … has been some what of a true mirror to my heart both good and bad! They them selves haven’t done anything but be respectful and kind.
However, between their actions and words. I was being reminded of my indecisiveness, my poor time management skills, and everything else I thought was good at.
While they where handling their task and still trying to fit my complicated self into their lives. I wasn’t truly doing the same.
See I’ve learned how to get things done well enough to be good and “DAMN GOOD!”
But not my best effort!
When it came to actual work I used my looks, charm, and MERCY/FAVOR FROM “GOD” TO GET BY!
WHICH IS SO NOT ACCEPTABLE!
“IM LOOKING AT THE MAN IN THE MIRROR!”
The True Mirror.
I think maybe we all should.
Again, when I say mirror I don’t mean the physical, I mean the internal.
“For you hard headed knuckleheads…”
Take it day by day…It can be scary.
EASE ON DOWN THE ROAD!